A Mixed World

"Welcome, Maharani!" I said to Maha when she came for a playdate with Anna last Wednesday.
Maha is a moon-faced beauty with long, silky brown hair and wide eyes. 
"Maharani?" she asks, puzzled.
"Yes, Maharani means Empress in our language" informs Anna wisely.
"Which language is your language?"
"Well, I speak English at school but my mother tongue is Marathi" said Anna.
"What is a mother tongue?" asks Maha.
"It is the language that belongs to your culture, or the place where you come from" said I, interfering in the conversation.
"Wait, but what about me? I come from two cultures. Which is my mother tongue?"
Maha's father is English and her mum is from the Philippines.
Both girls are thoughtful.
Then Anna says, "You can say that you have a mother tongue and a father tongue." They giggle as they lick their spoons of shrikhand - a sweet dessert.
Maha makes a serious face and shares a revelation. 
"You know, when I was younger, I used to think that everybody had mothers and fathers from two different countries."
"Why?" asks Anna.
"Well, you know, in the international school that I went to, all children had parents from two different countries, that's why."
"That's so strange" said Anna.
"But what if..." chorused both girls.
"Happy ice-cream!" they called out together when they realised that they had said the same words. 
It's a silly girly thing they do - if two girls say the same word or words, the first one to call out "Happy icecream!" has to be treated to an ice-cream by the other. 

...

And I thought, "Yes, what if...? 
What if everybody had parents from two different places? 
Then down the generations, with a mixed gene pool, would we evolve to look alike?
Would the world then be a more homogeneously harmonious place to be called home? 
With less differences in race, colour, religion, language, etc., wouldn't we have a universal human culture?
If our ancestry was not physically obvious, would there be a reduction in hate crimes?
Would the world be a place that has finally made peace with itself?

These thoughts reminded me of a wonderful song by Gbenga Adenuga about global harmony that was chosen by my beautiful friend, Ahlaam (herself a descendent of mixed Arab-African ancestry), for the winter celebration assembly that we had organised at school last December. 
See link below for the lyrics:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjyLkXjK69I

(Picture courtesy: Google images)

 

pam's picture perusal

 
when pam's Cousin's Daughter got married in Singapore, pam did not go. 

pam's Cousin was Ridiculously Rich, thanks to the business sense of his wife who owned a spa chain in the ultra- touristy island nation. 

pam was invited by email. 
well, as you know, these days when the world has come so close, most communication is done online. the email arrived two weeks before the Wedding. the invitation was stylishly designed with classic black and white motifs. The RSVP deadline was past when pam received the email. 

pam said:
"They are Big, Busy People, you know. They have to make bookings in Big Hotels for the number of guests who will come for the Wedding party."
we told pam that she must go to the Grand Wedding as it is a once-in-a-lifetime event. 
"no no no... Grand Weddings - not my thing. as you can see, the RSVP date is past. it means that my presence is not important. my sister is going so I will tell her to give a gift on my behalf.

pam said many of her relatives travelled from goa to Singapore, including the groom's family. a day after the wedding, pam's sister sent her a picture. It showed pam's sister, her husband, and her teenaged son, royce, standing in stiff formal clothes on a platform bedecked with flowers and a large board in the background that announced - 'Alice weds David'.

"but where is Alice and David?" asked pam, disappointed.

pam's sister replied: 

we could not get a closer look, forget picture!  It was Grand Ballroom event and lotsa people.

we met other friends from goa there who attended from bridegroom side.

pam texted:

Grand Weddings, Grand People.
our Cousin must be so relieved after its all over.

did royce have a good time? must be nice bumping into people from goa.
perhaps it was a good decision that I didn't come since you say it was quite crowded.

pam's sister said: 

yup Grand Pipol Grand Everything….

royce had so many ?'s

why waste money Big Hotel?
why waste foodz?
why give gifts if they are so Rich?
why cannot give charity also the foodz?
why waste other pipol time?
etc. etc. . .too much

my answer to royce very simple..i told him it is bzness...even They don't want to do They have to do coz they have bzness and must show off to make more contacts for more n more bzness...They have to invite and get invited, grow circles....etc. etc.

slowly royce understand.  

pam replied:
living simply is so much better.
royce will learn.

pam's sister said:

royce is good at being simple..like us.

a week after the Wedding, pam's Cousin sent a picture of the Newly Wedded Couple to all his relatives. It showed the Beautiful Bride and the Proud Groom on the church altar standing like Royals.  in the background, there was an image of the crucified Christ. The picture showed his agonised body, waist downwards, with the feet nailed to the cross. 

   
pam was bitter. she said to her sister:

very good.

even in God's own world it depends on who is the star or stars of the day and the focus is on the Stars. They know He is so kind and tolerant and  will not react even if you cut Him in half. if They really don’t even know, heaven help them.

Jesus said, "Forgive them father for they know not what they are doing.”

pam's sister replied:

really .... cutting Jesus in half and all. how photographer didn't notice?

but Jesus is all-forgiving star.

pam said:

who cares!

Picture doesn’t look professional anyway. it is an amateur smart phone pic. 

don't worry too much. we have better things to worry about. 

a month later, pam showed us a picture of a bishop reading in a newly-opened church in a middle-eastern capital city. once again, the picture showed an image of the crucified Christ - his agonised body, waist downwards, with the feet nailed to the cross. this picture was definitely shot by a professional photographer who worked for a standard newspaper. 

pam was very bitter. she said, " see what depths humanity has fallen to - nobody even cares to realize what is happening as long as the subject is in clear focus while busy setting up the house of God.

how would you feel if you, as a host in your own house-warming function, are edited, dissected, or simply forgotten and ignored in the photographs according to convenience for the sake of portraying your finance managers and brokers who are openly promoting your name, character, and good ways to others, but keeping fame and money for themselves?" 

pam showed us the link below:

http://www.thenational.ae/storyimage/AB/20150611/ARTICLE/150619741/EP/1/2/EP-150619741.jpg&MaxW=640&imageVersion=default

(Picture courtesy: Google images)

   


(With valuable inputs from my big brother, R. D'Cruz)

The Numbers Game

S and I had made a deal before our baby was born. 
He, being of a technically-oriented brain was to teach our child Maths and Science, and I would teach Languages and Social Sciences. 
When Anna was born, I was confident that like other girls, she would share my love of languages.
...

One day, last year, during a Parent's Afternoon, I sat in front of Anna's teacher who explained to me the intricacies of solving a mathematical problem. 
S was working away from Muscat at that time. 
"Miss, can you please explain this to Anna directly?" I pleaded. 
"Uh...ok" said the teacher, quite perplexed, and closed the book. 

This triggered a memory of my Sophia College days. 
Miss Shanti, our docile Maths teacher with the well-oiled plait and a sandalwood tika on her forehead, proceeded to derive an equation on the blackboard. 
She went on and asked us from time to time, "Are you with me?" 
Most students nodded seriously and replied, "Yes, Miss".
I, on the other hand, had lost the plot from the first line of the equation. 
In my mind, I was tying up the loose ends of a story that had taken a definite shape.
I did not notice it when Miss Shanti turned to me and asked directly, "Are you with me?"
I looked around and saw the others staring at me.
"Are you with me?" Miss Shanti glared. Her sandalwood tika glared too. 
"Yes...Miss....yes...I...er...I am with you."
"Then why were you smiling?"
"Miss...er...I am sorry, Miss"
"Am I a joker paid to entertain you?" The others giggled a bit.
"No, Miss" I looked down, suddenly guilty.
"Listen, this is a Maths class and I don't want any more smiling."
"Yes, Miss....sorry, Miss."
After that, just before every Maths class, I remembered the glaring sandalwood tika on Miss Shanti's forehead. I stopped attending Maths lectures. 

I graduated as an English major. 

...

Yesterday:

"8118" Anna was reading out the number of the car in front of us.
"What is so special about that?" I asked.
"Nothing. I just liked this number."
"Why?"
"Mama, don't you see the symmetry?"
"Hmmm....yes, I do now."

"35421" Anna reads out the number of the car behind us. 
"Now what?"
"Mama, how can you miss the serial order?"
"Hmmm..."
I focus on the road ahead.

...

Auntie Violet went to school with my mother-in-law.
"Please pass on my regards to your mother-in-law" she always said whenever she called. 
One day, I asked her, "Auntie, why do you think of her so fondly?"
She said, "Your mother-in-law helped me with Maths during our school days."
"Oh I see."
I saw more than I said I saw.

...

(Pictures courtesy: Google images)

A Day in the Life of 100 Expat Women - A Book Project

The images that emerged from Nepal after the earthquake were touching. 
I sat in front of the TV twiddling my thumbs and not knowing how I could help. Some friends called up to say, "Let's do something for Nepal". 

Opportunities to help come in unexpected ways. I got my opportunity by contributing to the Book Project. All I had to do was to write about a typical day in my life as an expat woman.To be an expat woman is quite an adventure, especially if one has lived in several countries around the world. 
For this project I wrote a little piece about my driving lessons, Arabic lessons, our cats, and the birds in our garden on Fahud Street in Muscat. It was a pleasure to let readers have a peep into my life.

This is a charitable project aiming to help women in Nepal to help themselves. The charity raises funds by writing, publishing and selling books. It is now compiling a new book entitled - A Day in the Life of 100 Expat Women. Since book publishing costs are donated and work on the project is by volunteers, all proceeds from sale of the books go directly to charity. 

I am writing this, friends, to encourage you to share a day in your life and help Nepal. Imagine how interesting it would be to read about the lives of other contemporary expat women around the world when the book is published!


If you are an expat woman who would like to contribute to this project, please read the following email that Jacqueline Dyer, who is editing the Book Project, sent to me recently.  

The Book project aims to raise funds to help women in Nepal to help themselves. By educating and empowering Nepalese women, the plight of thousands of women and children can be changed and the orphanages would not be so full.

Women of the world we ask you to help us do this. We know we cannot do everything but we can do this. Please be part of our next book and know you are making a positive difference to the lives of many women and children. 

Rosa Matherson edited the first edition - A day in the life of 100 British Women. Rosa is one of the most inspirational women I have ever known. She has asked me to do the next book. A day in the life of 100 expatriate women. 

You are my top twenty of choice. However I need to ask 80 more expatriate women to write about their lives.So please could you ask all your expat friends if they would be interested in contributing to The Book Project. 

Nothing will be edited out and it will go into the book just as its written.Maybe you have a funny story to tell, perhaps you have been involved in a lock down or evacuation, been involved in charity fund raising. Whatever it is you want to share will be a huge contribution to the book and you will be making a difference. The books sell for ten pounds sterling. Every penny goes to the project as we have volunteers that do all the printing and publishing for free. Every 100 books sold will fund a project in Nepal. 

The first projected funded by the book was The River Girls. Five bright girls that were keen to try and get out of poverty and do something positive. They are now trained Nepali adventure tour guides and organise white water rafting and other adventure tours - a first for women in Nepal. Its going very well and they now have their own boat house and equipment. 

Several other projects funded by the book are going well. So ladies, take to your pens and laptops. Writing of special events, personal experiences, even daily routines will create a very human snapshot of expatriate women.

I do hope you will all join me in The Book Project.Please confirm if you wish to be a part of it,  also please give my contact details to any expat women that you think will enjoy this experience and help us make a difference.

Contact: Jackie Dyer
             countessdyer@gmail.com

Website: 
 www.the100womenbookproject.com